Jump Or Wean

Reasearch, watch a video, read a book
Different authors say different things
No one making money off me wants me to quit, of course their answer is wean down, cut back
Even my husband, who wants me off really bad….is scared of what will happen, he says wean down
I can’t do this on my own, I can’t wean down
If I had willpower at all, I would not be here
When I quit drinking, I just stopped
I was in a bad place. I got drunk and hurt my kid. Not physically, just yelled. But I cussed at her. I swore to myself never ever again. And so far, 21 months later I haven’t had a drop
Then pills escalated
Then rehab
Then this limbo I’ve been in with subs
They have saved my life, but what are they doing to me in the process. I don’t know, no one knows. They are still too new
I say jump off
But when? Today? Tomorrow? In a month?
I wish God would take it, just like he took alcohol from me

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